The Lately: In Freelance and in Health

1. [ F ] U N E M P L O Y ED

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That is right, folks! I, along with other friends who are also job hunting, am a fresh grad unemployed bum. Oh the words, they stinggg! I have been sending out my resume, going to job interviews, bumming, sulking, and waiting since I graduated last March (note to self: it is already May). I am honestly starting to worry a little bit about where my life is headed or, to be more specific, if my life is even headed anywhere given that I can’t even land myself a job. Not to worries, though, I’m not that depressed over it. Honestly, the time I have now is being spent on catching up on family matters, myself, and visions of what I really want to do in life (and books and movies and shows). I’m not complaining; I’m slowly having peace of mind and heart which I feel is the universe telling me that the job will come when I am ready. Lets face it, maybe I’m not.

Recently, though, I have been wanting to experience what my other block mates have been experiencing. Other than the money and stress, I also want to learn what I’ve been dying to learn ever since I fell in love with Advertising and Communication in college. What exactly do you say to difficult clients? Who do you go to when you have a problem with a Creative? How is the job different from my experience in a school organization? Will everything I learn actually be of use? I want to apply everything I know to a real job.

But alas! It will have to wait! For now, I’ll be sending out my resumes to everyone. (Also, hello to possible employers! Please hire me. I want to work.) hahaha

2. 

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While the universe and I have been figuring out when I will absolutely be ready, I have been on freelancer.ph, which is a site for freelance artists who want to earn. So far I have made a flyer for a beauty salon and have yet to digitalize (digitize?) a shirt design, another flyer, and a paper bag design. I’m loving it, because it challenges me and gives me the overdue Illustrator practice I need. So far, it has been great. I’ve also been reading up on design books so I get to know the elements broken down.

3. KAYLA FREAKING ITSINES

Kayla Itsines is a trainer and recently released two e-books on attaining the bikini bod of your dreams. I found her on Instagram and took the entire time scrolling through her feed. The transformations of different girls are insane! Not to mention, their stories are really motivating. Ever since I stumbled upon her feed, I have been wanting to get more fit and healthy. I started my summer already cutting down on food that wasn’t healthy for me but I couldn’t bring myself to actually exercise. Luckily, my boyfriend got to wake me up this morning and yelled me out of bed to actually do what I’ve been wanting to do since March. Hopefully, this becomes a lifestyle and I actually achieve a healthier more fit me.

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The Lately: In Freelance and in Health

100: The colorful week

21. January 27, 2014

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Color: Brown
Leaving these little envelopes and helping out the cause definitely started my day right!

22. January 28, 2014

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Color: Pink
Magel brought this phone with her to school and I loved it! It was so bright pink and took the loveliest pictures. Phones like this remind me that I don’t need the best gadgets to prove my worth in photography. I just have to know my basics well enough to apply them.

23. January 29, 2014

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Color: White

Grown up outfit. Grown up bag. Grown up lunch.

Alex, Danie, and I talked about graduation, the job search, the condo search, salaries, and more. The future is definitely scary but I find that facing it with the best people makes it bearable.

24. January 30, 2014

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Color: Orange
Presidential duty no. 10 DONE!

25. January 31, 2014

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Color: Red
The best part of the day was catching up with all of my favorite TV series including Gravity Falls. I’m so excited for it to return this February!

26. February 1, 2014

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Color: Black
Ball or no ball. I am so lucky to have this stunner for a date.

Also, Alex, Gabe and I went to SM Megamall and Shangri La to shop for a gown. I love that I got to spend such a tiring task with two of my favorite people.

27. February 2, 2014

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Color: Purple
Spent the day with vertigo and Gabe. Now You See Me is such an awesome movie and watching it with someone as goofy as Gabe made it twice as good.

100: The colorful week

100.

As you may have read from my previous post, I have decided to make 2014 less of a negative year than the years before. Luckily for me, I was able to find a website that will hopefully help me out with that. 100happydays.com challenges the individual into being happy for 100 days by looking for things that brightened up their day (everyday for a hundred days). The site also gives us reasons why people often dismiss this challenge and reasons for why people should try it as well. Given that we now exist in a world that is so fueled by achievement and the never ending update of what is bigger, better, and more efficient, we, as a result, turn busy and forget about the little things that actually made us smile and thankful. From here, there comes a bigger tendency to focus on the negative because we seemingly don’t “see” the good things happening to us and only remember the bad things.

Each week I will be posting the things that made me happy for each day starting from January 7.

1. January 7, 2014

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To be honest and brief, I hate my birthday.

Every year feels just like the other and I feel no more special than anyone else not celebrating their birthday at all. Not that I want all the attention if that’s what you were thinking. But I do wish sometimes that the day of my birth would feel more special than normal.

This year, I achieved that. Or at least some extent of it. This year I was going for genuine. I told myself earlier on, “no matter who does and doesn’t. It’s all about the people who mean it.”

My friends from the dorm greeted me at midnight with pizza, notes, and a serenade. This gave me a good start to my day because I didn’t expect it at all. It was great to see my friends again and everyone seemed to be really happy. Which made me happy.

Gabe then surprised me later in the morning with breakfast from Family Mart and a bouquet of sunflowers. The morning was definitely the best for me. I received a lovely shortcake, a letter, and pictures from Ina and tear-jerking words from all my other friends care of Gabe.

Towards the end of the day, I started feeling blue and more insecure than ever but I’d like to think that it’s a part of this growth I need to embrace. The important moral lesson I’ve learned from all this is that you can’t choose your greetings. Sometimes, yes, it would be nice to be greeted by people you love, but at the same time it would be nice to be celebrated by people who actually care. And that I think is what is truly genuine.

2. January 8, 2014

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Today started with spending time with Gabe. He needed to get his mind off things and so we landed ourselves in Conti’s with a lovely hearty lunch and ‘no-problems’ session. We ended up talking about Theology, religion, marriage, and child free couples. Afterwards, we went to UP’s Via Mare where I pitched a CoSA project to 2 advertising presidents and the FAO president herself.

Afterwards, we headed back to school for our weekly CODE meeting which ended the day with riding with Carmela to Third Cup, a good reflection, and having some well deserved Tomato Brie.

3. January 9, 2014

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Graduation is in a few months. Thoughts of it scare me sometimes but not this morning. This morning felt okay.

4. January 10, 2014

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After a crazy day of CoSA meetings, application forms, and problems, I ended the day with fellow officers listening to the End of Sem Council Report. It was good to end the day with people I’ve come to know. For as long as I have these people to guide me in my last hurrahs as President, then I think I’ll be okay.

5. January 11, 2014

Ho2 Ho4This deserves a separate post  which will be posted within this week 🙂

6. January 12, 2014

1514322_10151810274141436_1459001230_nSunday was spent with the Constitution and a lovely book searching with Vince. Everything in Fullybooked Cubao was 50% off! Unfortunately, when we got there, all the good books were gone and I ended up buying nothing. Afterwards, Vince treated me to Cibo which I think made up for coming out of Fullybooked empty handed.

100.

When 2014 gets tough…

I have lost a lot of people, felt a variety of lowest of lows, and hurt so many people this year. I can’t say this year has been the best or the most inspiring because it wasn’t. If I’m being honest, it was definitely one of the most challenging and overwhelming years I have experienced. However, I’m also not saying it was the worst. In fact, this year had its fair share of amazing and blissful moments– moments I wish I could relive and feel again, moments I feel were the best there was.

I have realized, though, that I am one hell of a negative person. There is just so much negativity clouding my mind and personality which makes me such a lonely person when really I could be happier. So so soooo much happier! This mini “existential” epiphany of mine has then led to resolutions I hope 2014 me will practice.

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1. To be more confident in myself—my capabilities, my work, my future, and my life.

2. To be more kind to myself and less critical of my flaws and mistakes

3. To be more kind to others and less judgmental. To forgive and actually forget faults, fights, and disagreements.

4. To be more open minded and understanding of unexpected circumstances and situations out of my control.

5. To try harder with my relationships, work, dreams, goals, and future. To not simply ‘give up’ when the rubbles become boulders.

6. To be more responsible and to act upon my duties wisely.

7. To love myself, what I do, who I have in my life, what I have in my life, and all the blessings and opportunities.

8. To take care of yourself for once.

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Resolutions are meant to be broken is what people might say to the adversities that await the year ahead. True enough, I have never not broken resolutions I have always set up for myself. This time, however, I plan to change things for myself. But what happens when things do get difficult? What then?

1. Think of the people that matter and people who have stuck around and who have always stuck around for you even at your worst.

2. Think of what you love and people who love what you love as well.

3. Think of the many many things there are to discover, understand, and explore.

4. Think of your parents and the many blessings they have showered you with.

5. Think of the kind words people casually and consciously give you.

6. Think of what you want to do with your life and who you want to affect and touch.

lostEveryday I feel I always fight the good fight but never get anywhere anyway and sometimes just prove myself right that I never do end up anywhere. Everyday, I have attacks and forget that my body is not a medium where I can unleash my confused and aggressive state. I always feel like I drive down an endless road alone, afraid, and never with a friendly touch–not even a smile–to guide me to what is right or good.

Everyday feels like a constant battle with demons I did not volunteer to slay. Every. Day.

But (hopefully) not this year. 2013 has taught me a few things and I hope I actually get to use them this 2014. I hope this year will actually be my year and I hope this goes the same for all of you who feel the same way.

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When 2014 gets tough…